I Got Lonely On My Business Trip

色色

I checked into a hotel on a business trip and was a bit lonely so I thought I'd get me one of those girls you see advertised in phone booths when your calling for a cab.

I grabbed a card on my way in. It was an ad for a girl calling herself Erogonique, a lovely girl, bending over in the photo. She had all the right curves in all the right places, beautiful long wavy hair, long graceful legs all the way up to her ass. You know the kind. So I'm in my room and figure, what the hell, I'll give her a call.

"Hello?" the woman says. God, she sounded sexy.

"Hi, I hear you give a great massage and I'd like you to come to my room and give me one. No, wait, I should be straight with you. I'm in town all alone and what I really want is sex. I want it hard, I want it hot, and I want it now. I'm talking kinky the whole night long. You name it, we'll do it. Bring all your implements, toys, everything you've got in your bag of tricks.We'll go hot and heavy all night; Tie me up, wear a strap on, cover me in chocolate syrup and whip cream, anything you want baby. Now, how does that sound?"

She says, "That sounds fantastic, but for an outside line you need to press 9."

apple3800

FCH

女郎原创吧，呵呵

色色

Birds On A Penis

Mrs. Cohen, Mrs. Levy, and Mrs. Lefkovitz are discussing their sons.

Mrs Cohen says, "Now my Sheldon, what a man! A world famous lawyer, he
is, with big shot clients, a mansion in Beverly Hills, a summer home
in Hawaii. He has a beautiful wife, and everything a man could want in
the world.

"Mrs. Levy says, "That's nice. Lemmie tell you about my son
Johnathan. He is a doctor, a world-famous researcher. He travels
across the world on conferences, talks, lectures. He was nominated for
a Nobel prize in Medicine.

What a man!"Mrs. Lefkowitz says, "My
Hershel, he's an engineer. Now, he makes maybe $35,000 a year, and
he's not famous. But his Pee Pee is so long, you can line up ten
pigeons in a row on it.

"The ladies sip their tea for a while. Then,
Mrs. Cohen says, "Actually, I got a confession to make. Sheldon's an
up-and-coming lawyer in Los Angeles, but he doesn't have a mansion or
a summer home. He's a bright young man with a good future."Mrs. Levy
says: "Well, I got a confession too. Johnathan is a good doctor, and
he got his share of scholarships, but a Nobel prizewinner, he isn't."

They all look expectantly at Mrs. Lefkowitz."Well, all right, I'll
tell the truth too. The last bird gotta stand on one leg."

色色

Condom buyers

A guy was at the supermarket and after buying a few things he began to
queue up in this really long line for the checkout.
   After about 15 minutes in the line he reached the checkout girl
and just at that moment he remembered that he needed some condoms.
   Not wanting to line up again he said to the girl "Oh I meant to
buy some condoms but forgot"
   "Do you know what size you are?" she asked. "No," he replied.
   "OK drop your pants and I'll tell you what size you are".
   The guy then, not being the shy type, drops his trousers and the
girl has a feel with her hand and then says in the microphone "1
packet of large condoms to aisle 3 please", he pulls up his trousers,
the condoms are brought to him and he pays his bill and goes on his
way.
   Another male customer sees this and thinks he'd like to have this
nice girl fondling his prick and so says the same thing to the girl.
   A similar course of events takes place, only this time after
having a feel she says "One packet of medium sized condoms to aisle 3
please", the condoms are then brought to him and he pays the bill and
goes on his way.
   Also watching this course of events was a rather excitable 15 year
old boy who then decides to queue up and try the same routine.
   "I'd like to buy some condoms please, but I forgot" he says.
   "Do you know what size you are?" she asked.
   "No," he replied.
   "OK, I'll check. Whoops, mop and bucket to aisle 3 please!"

那时枫叶

口味太重了。。。闪。。。

彩虹

"I want it hard, I want it hot, and I want it now."!

彩虹

最后一句没看懂！

CICI

外线先拨9

lotusleaf

全是原创？跟作者名字很匹配。。。。

枫铃

haha,it seemed  your trip was so bored!
you do are very lonely! I can do and only can do is show my sympathizing!